gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
Fuck everything. It's hot, summer sucks and I want the world to go away and leave me alone. I have plenty to say but not to anyone. I can't write right now, and this is killing me. I want to draw but I make the mistake of getting on Tumblr, which inevitably intimidates me out of it because I know I can't compare to any of the actual, you know, professionals and for some reason I still feel the need to compare. I don't have the energy to put effort into anything, especially the things I actually love. I can't deal with anything and just really want to stop feeling miserable. It's boring, being this fucking sad and angry and frustrated all the time. I'm done now, can I stop, please? I'd like to go back to the happy emotions.



Jun. 9th, 2014 08:47 pm
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
I've been inexplicably exhausted all day, rereading Good Omens and catching how many British to American translation footnotes in it, my currant healthcare provider kind of sucks, and the Captain America 2 HISHE still isn't out. I'm not sure what this post is. Good night.


Jun. 5th, 2014 09:50 pm
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (cake)
I wish was eloquent and insightful and intelligent on this blog. Most of the time I'm just posting for the sake of having something to post. It's not like I don't have a constantly running monologue of my thoughts for the day, conveniently already mostly linear and in English, (rather than fuzzy impressions) but by the time I sit down to type shit up I've either already forgotten it or decided it wasn't important, or conversely, too important. This sharing my feelings business is shit. But I did start this out to write up my thoughts in diary-like form, so I'll try and persevere as long as I can remember and stand it.

In other news, it's really fucking hot, and there are grasshoppers everywhere. Now do you people (whoever you may be) believe in global warming?!
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (cake)
Brain, I am ordering you to write your campaign. It has to be ready by Friday. You have today and Thursday to get this done, and you have class at two on both those days. Work. Do not, repeat, do not use wanting to reread the giant monster-fanfic it took you more than a day of almost non-stop reading to finish yesterday as an excuse to show up unprepared for this campaign you've known you were doing since literally this time last year. Don't do that.

gen_is_gone: a sprig of lilac, with May 25th as a description (how do they rise up?)
blah blah blah work is hard, how do I even social. We had a DnD intervention that seemed to go quite well, and hopefully Problem Player won't be a problem anymore. He's been given a last warning and is on a probationary period. I venture to at least express encouragement from his reactions; he apologized, then worked with us to come up with a contract to stop him from his cheating/other things, which I take as a promising sign.

I am also worldbuilding again, for my campaign. I'm pretty legit excited too.

I don't want to go to bed, but mostly because I don't want to get up tomorrow.

And I forgot I was going to have all of my posts this week use the Glorious 25th icon, so here it is with only two days left until Lilac Day.
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
Really, I should stop putting it off. All of my laundry is piled on my bed. Fuck.

I am two episodes behind on Night Vale and unable to focus for any length of time on things that aren't tragic super soldiers. This is not actually productive. On the other hand, I now have a plan, a plot and a setting for the campaign I'm DMing, and hopefully I can use this to reign in our group's problem player and boost the self-esteem of another player as well. This was the goal discussed at last night's session, anyway.

La. I want to write things, but things aren't being written.
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
I want to make a TvTropes page for True Talents but it's locked for having been a stub when the page was open and I can't figure out the ask system to get it the fuck unlocked. I also want to do page construction on Hidden Talents and another book called The Girl with the Silver Eyes (yay childhood nostalgia!) but I have no idea where to start. *whines*

Also, having now fully caught up with Agents of SHIELD...Fitz must have totally had a thing for Ward. Otherwise, why the fuck is he more angry than Skye? Than Coulson?! And yay Fury's finally coming back. And Trip continues to be adorable.

And I want Winter Soldier fanfic.
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
I am filled with the need write things. Nothing particularly coherent, just things. Like Kate Stewart getting into shouting matches about appropriating alien tech with Phil Coulson. Or oddball-coping-with-trauma domestic fluff between Martin and Trash post True Talents. Or the incredibly weird thing on the backburner about elves based on specific actors who've been exiled for whatever reason from Faerie and who are running around screwing with humans for kicks.

Or worldbuilding like an actual writer who writes things daily and doesn't fucking procrastinate all the time. Or working on the D&D campaign I'm supposedly DMing sometime this summer which I've planned for a grand total of Not At All. Or even drawing some half-decent fanart that I put effort into for once. Or something.

Summer has started and I have a week before official job-hunting begins. I have this time more or less to myself to write, and yet all I can do is mope around and wait for someone else to finish writing something I desperately want to read.

gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (cake)
In more or less a continuation of yesterday's foray into teen not-quite horror, and for more or less the same reasons (i.e. Sebastian Stan being attractive and relevant to my currant interests) I watched the first few episodes of Kings. My response, inasmuch as I have one, is a resounding...meh.

I have something of a history with Kings, in that by complete accident, and without having ever seen it, it inspired one of my original fic worlds. Coming back from a vacation in New York the year it came out, I saw a trailer for it in taxi and was curious, but had no way of accessing it at the time and had already forgotten about it later. I never got around to watching it, or even looking it up, really, and I didn't actually realize it was meant to be a setting update of the story of David until now.

(The world in question isn't at all related to what this show is actually about, and mostly just shares the concept of a modern monarchy with unusual fondness for the color orange. But still.)

I ended up more frustrated than anything, because it's clear that an awful lot of money went into this enterprise, but mostly? the writing is mediocre at best. For a show about modernizing some quite epic biblical stories very little happens for long stretches of time, and for a political thriller it's annoyingly unsubtle. There was so much potential that was sort of left up in the air, and unfortunately it's easy to see how the writing didn't justify the budget. It's a shame too, 'cause the scenery porn is absolutely gorgeous.

Not entirely sure why the past what? three things I've posted have been reviews of some kind, but whatever. I'm not sure why I'm doing this, as nobody's going to read it, so mainly this is just a slightly more socially acceptable way of talking to myself. Works for me.
gen_is_gone: two one way arrows pointing in opposite directions (Default)
I have nothing whatsoever to say, but I feel obligated to do something with this account, seeing as how I've had it for over a year. God, my life is uninteresting.


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